If you prefer listening to reading, I have a handy podcast of this post right here:
One of the main goal of Mama’s Comfort Camp is to normalize the motherhood struggles, and help us all know that we are not the only freaks in town having a rough ride. Lately the Den Mothers and I have been wondering if the PT posting structure is getting in the way of that. We also noticed that it’s being used to discuss things that don’t really require it.
So let’s take a moment to look at the what, why and how of the PT post.
What is it?
A. Potentially Triggering /Painful Topic.
B. The person writing it is Practically Toast, she is totally burnt out and triggered herself.
C. It comes with a Permission Tent: permission to skip the post if you are feeling fragile.
D. All of the above.
Why use it?
Because Mama’s Comfort Camp is a Permission-Based Healing space, we make room for joy and for pain, and we warn our friends when something painful is coming up.
Only YOU decide if you can handle someone else’s pain right now, or not.
If you happen to be feeling fragile, please give yourself permission to skip that thread for now. This group is large enough that we can trust that someone else will read and respond, it doesn’t have to be you. If you are feeling up to it and are ready to read a PT post, you can use the warning to brace yourself and activate your force field, so you can respond rather than react to the story you are about to read.
When there is NO NEED to use PT:
When the situation you are dealing with is within the normal (and yes, uber-challenging) realm of motherhood, and you are upset or worried, but still able to interact with your struggle from a stance of trust that this suckness is temporary, there is no need to start with PT. So for example, if we are dealing with sleep deprivation, if you are feeling unsafe or hopeless, do start with a PT. Otherwise just write a status update about what’s going on for you, and let us know if you are seeking advice in addition to hugs and validation.
When you DO NEED to use it:
Start with PT when you are writing from a triggered state. If you feel like you are dealing with impending doom, start your post with PT, no matter what the subject is.
And it would a good idea to start with PT when the subject is one of the following: Death/grief/loss/miscarriage, life-threatening illness, mental illness, impending break up or divorce, intrusive thoughts, rage, violence/abuse, substance abuse (the case of violence, abuse, or substance abuse we will support you in seeking help from organizations better suited to meeting your needs). If your post centers on postpartum depression and related issues, consider posting it at the #ppdchat group which is a great forum for discussing Postpartum Depression/PPAnxiety/PPOCD /medications /therapies, etc… #PPDchat was created by Lauren Hale, and it includes many Mama Comfort Campers (including me and all of our Den Mothers), all eager to support you over there too. If you’d like to be added to the #ppdchat group, please raise your hand in the comments.
How to write an effective PT post:
Start the post with PT+ subject (PT grief, PT anxiety, etc.) don’t start telling your story yet, just click post after the PT+label.
Begin telling your story in the first comment.
Please Try to keep all related updates in the same thread, so we can better keep up with your story as it unfolds. Please don’t forget to let us know as things improve.
Thank you for taking the time to read (or listen), and for respecting our group culture. If you have any questions or comments, please do not hesitate to voice them in the comments.
Hugs all around,
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